So I was watching "Parks and Recreation" for the tenth time through, and for the tenth time I drew some knowledge.
The show is hilarious and is full of life. At this point in my life, I realized is that it's not about the fun times they had or all of the shenanigans they got themselves into. It was truly about a group of people coming together to do good things for their selves, each other, and their community.
They built lifelong relationships so that they could create a better future for everyone around them. But also, for their own self health and wealth.
If I could be like anyone on that show, I would have to be a Tom Haverford. Not just because I kinda look like him, but because he's a dreamer.
In the series finale, Tom had dreams of turning his restaurant into a nationwide chain. He ultimately failed at another one of his business ventures.
As he laid on his couch sulking, mourning about what he had and lost, his wife tells him that he will figure it out. Because he always does.
He turned his failures into a book "Failure: An American Success Story."
And that title right there is poetry.
What have you really done in your life if you haven't failed? Being as bold as Tom's character is something to strive for.
You haven't even really gone for something big if you've never felt a sense of failure.
If you're an essential worker in this time, I just want to say thank you for all your doing. You're holding this country together!
And for all you non-essential workers, I hope y'all are staying your happy asses at home! Because that is just as important!
But what's important is that you do something worthwhile with your time. Now that doesn't mean you can't be lazy and just enjoy life for a bit. There will never be a time in your life when you'll be able to pretty much do nothing with little responsibility. So enjoy it.
However, you should at least start planning for that thing you've always wanted to do. Time has always been the thing holding you back, right? Well now you've got nothing but time.
At least until the end of April, at the absolute earliest. Like, we haven't even ended March yet. We got a long way to go.
Start that art project. Study for that Real Estate exam. Practice your craft. Utilize the resources you do have, especially the internet. Clean for your fucking house.
I can't begin to explain how many of you I see making Tik Toks in a messy ass house. Have some decency. And be clean, please.
You can binge watch Netflix whenever, you do that already in your normal lives anyway. Take a break from the normalcy, and try something that you might fail at.
Have the courage to do what you've always wanted to do, but felt like you didn't have time for.
Be like Tom Haverford.
It's difficult to cherish every moment of every day. We all go through tough times where we wish for better days.
And we all handle the every day struggles of life differently. Everyone has their outlets that help them get through the day.
And for us over here at Under The Irrelevance, writing is our outlet.
And it could be yours, too.
For those who just don't know us personally, all of our content is produced by Anthony Vallesteros. He received his bachelor's degree from Arizona State University in Communications in the Mass Media. He took multiple courses on writing, media, and social media.
He started his own blog in 2012 which led to getting recruited to be a contributor for a sports website. There, he learned the ins and outs of what it takes to be recognized as a writer in the online community.
He took what he learned from there and built this website which has been a platform for ideas, opinions, and culture. But now, he wants to continue to give back to the online community through the use of writing in the digital medium.
Under The Irrelevance, up until now, has been the sound of one voice. But they say it takes a village to raise a child. And in this case, it takes a community of voices to build a safe space for forward thinkers.
My best friend sent me a video today about a guy who survived three point blank shots from a shotgun. He talked about escaping death, and the out of body experiences he felt while he fought for his life.
He brought up multiple times how lucky he was to be alive, and how happy his family was to have him still standing.
It really put everything into perspective for me. We are all only going to be on Earth for a short amount of time. And any day could truly be our last.
So why not do something to help the community around you? Why not be a part of something? Something bigger than you. Something that not only helps you grow, and creates an outlet for you, but could also change other peoples lives without you even knowing.
You never realize how your story can impact others until you put yourself out there for the world to see.
So I ask you, Do you want to be a part of something bigger? Do you want to learn how to share your ideas, art, and maybe even your feelings in a way that makes you more transparent than ever?
Come be a part of something bigger here at Under The Irrelevance.
If you would like to be a contributor for our site, DM us on Instagram or email us at firstname.lastname@example.org
1. a feeling of quiet pleasure or security, often while unaware of some potential danger, or the like; self-satisfaction or smug satisfaction with an existing situation, condition, etc.
This image is you looking at your past self, asking why you wasted all those hours living in complacency.
A feeling of quiet pleasure or security sounds like a good thing. Being in your own zone. You’re totally cool, calm, and collected. Yet in life, it can be a dangerous comfort zone.
Living in complacency never gets anyone anywhere. Staying in your comfort zone keeps you from taking chances, and reaching for those goals that you’ve been setting for yourself. Unless your goal is to continue working the same job, or having the same boring life, or eating the same boring food, or whatever it is that keeps you telling yourself “Well, this is good enough for me.”
When you live in that state of mind, you are oblivious to the potential danger around you. The definition makes it seem as if the danger is yet to be seen. But it is clear that living this way is dangerous in and of itself. You spend hours complaining that you want your life to be better, yet you don’t put in any effort to actually move forward. You are perfectly fine with feeling sorry for yourself.
Your self-satisfaction with your current situation allows you to trick yourself into thinking you’re actually happy with where you’re at. When people follow up with you about the goals you set for yourself, you find yourself spilling out excuses for why you haven’t accomplished what you said you would. When in reality, you have made conscious choices to avoid your goals as much as possible because you have told yourself you can’t do it. Which in turn, actually makes you believe that you’re right.
A “condition” often is in reference to a state of one’s health. Being in a state of complacency is not a condition, it’s a choice. It is not a disease, a doctor can’t write you a prescription for it. And although it is not airborne, it is extremely contagious.
Look at who you are surrounding yourself with. The friends you have are all just as complacent as you are. They tell you that what you’re doing in life is fine. When you fail to reach your goals, they believe that all your excuses are valid. They too, are living in complacency. And it’s contagious.
You need to realize that you are in control of your own choices. And that you can stop living in complacency, and start living in a constant state of growth. All you have to do is make the decision to stop being comfortable.
Breaking out of your comfort zone is the healthiest choice you can make for yourself right now. And seeing how it’s the beginning of the new year, you might as well add it to your resolution for 2019.
If you have friends who are living in complacency, tell them. If you’re a real friend and you care about the growth of those close to you, tell them that they’re doing themselves a disservice by not reaching higher. Hold them to the standard that you should hold yourself too.
Let’s redefine what living in complacency means. Your comfort zone should be a dangerous one because of the chances you’ll take on yourself. You may sometimes run into failure, but that’s better than not trying to better yourself at all.
Welcome to 2020, where our resolution is one.
Whenever it gets under 50 degrees in Central California, we assume the world is freezing over. Whenever there is a thin layer of ice on our car windshield, we think we're in the movie The Day After Tomorrow.
And whenever rainfall lasts longer than twelve hours, we break out the flood warnings. If a snowflake were ever to find its way here, people may just start evacuating the entire Central Valley.
As I sit here in my multiple layers of clothing, wrapped in a blanket, with my heater cranked to 76 degrees, I'm thinking about how eskimos ever existed. Maybe they still exist, I'm not sure.
But one thing I do know is that they were fuckin' trippin'. The "mind over matter" was real. The ability to bare the elements and still be able to not only survive, but create a living for themselves, is unfathomable.
The real reason I bring this up is because I'm really just wondering what a real winter is like. Snowfall, zero degree weather, snow tires on my car, all things we will never experience here in the valley. What is it about being comfortable with where we're at keep us from moving away when we get older?
Is it because we don't want to be away from our family and friends that we grew up with? Is it because we're afraid we might fail in a new environment? Is it because we think life will be so drastically different that we won't be able to keep up?
Whatever it is for each individual who stays in the same general area that they were born and raised, it all comes down to one thing. Fear of change. It's the one thing that most of us have in common, the fear of what's on the other side of a new challenge.
Now there's nothing wrong with staying where you're from. You don't need to make a change that drastic to grow. But making one small change for the better everyday could eventually lead to a drastic change in your life.
Today it may be deciding to drink one more glass of water a day and tomorrow it may be to read a chapter of a book everyday. And if you continue with your new changes, hopefully in a year or so you'd be drinking nothing but water, and you've had read multiple books and expanded your library.
Regardless of what changes you want to make in life, it all starts will small changes here and there. And once you get into the right state of mind where you are constantly seeking out change, you will eventually find yourself in the position you always imagined you would be.
The weather may look bad today, but just look at your forecast and realize that clear skies are coming soon.
Unless of course, you love cold weather. In which case it's only going to get better... or worse? I don't know what you cold weather people like.
Here was an ice cold banger...
On Saturday, November 23rd, students from both Harvard and Yale took a stand.
During halftime of the football game being played between these two schools, a protest was put on urging both schools to divest from fossil fuels. Other issues regarding climate change and Puerto Rico were also a part of this protest.
But we're not here to talk about the things they were protesting. Yet the immediate response from both schools and the Ivy League itself regarding the protest itself.
The game was delayed for a little over and hour, and about 20-30 protesters were arrested for trespassing. In any sporting event, it is illegal to go onto the field without permission. So the arrests were warranted given the circumstances.
The response however, was in their own words "Regrettable." Which is what the Ivy League deemed the protest.
The game was still going on and Yale officials made a comment saying that they "Stand firmly for the right to free expression." Sounds good right? But then they followed it up with "The exercise of free expression on campus is subject to general conditions, and we do not allow disruption of university events."
I'm sorry, what? A football game is being considered more important than world issues that could possibly have a lasting effect on the Earth itself.
Yale had the announcer state to the protesters "As a courtesy to both teams, the game must resume." The game?! These people are taking a stand for something real. Something that could affect our children.
It seems befuddling to me that two schools such as Harvard and Yale would stand against something like this. People speaking passionately about something they believe in. Their own students.
It almost makes you wonder what the schools themselves think a protest is. A protest is not supposed to be convenient. Protesters are not supposed to give you a time and place of their protest.
The whole point is to be an inconvenience in order to get the point across. This protest and the response just proved the protesters' point. These higher ups will do whatever it takes to shift the conversation to something else.
Instead of responding to what was being protested, they turned the protesters into the bad guys.
It's everything that is wrong with this country and the state of our government itself. Everyone has an opinion on Hong Kong fighting for freedom against China, when we don't even have freedom ourselves.
People tend to think that other countries should follow our fight against oppression, when we're the ones still being oppressed. We're talking about Hong Kong and their fight against privacy and the right to more information, but do you think you really have those things here in this country?
You have a lot more than most countries, yes. But moments like this make you realize that they're still against us. They don't want us to rise up because they fear what could happen.
Their dreams of an economic heaven on Earth would be shattered if we fought together for Earth itself. Their longing for more power would be killed.
So they continue to turn the story on us as the bad guys. The people fighting for something are the ones who are killing this country, and they project that message through media outlets. They make us fight each other instead of them.
Democrat, Republican, Green Party, it doesn't fucking matter. They just group all of us up to divide us.
And until people realize that, we're all going to be fighting for the wrong reasons.
I commend those students who took a stand today, and I thank them for displaying what truly means to be American.
When I was 8 years old, my parents asked me if I wanted to sign up to play tackle football. I had a couple of friends that were going to be on the team, and I thought it would be fun to play.
I fell in love with the game of football. A group of kids, learning how to battle together. Each one giving everything they can to achieve victory.
Getting life lessons from your coaches, and learning how to accept people of all different types of backgrounds. All for the love of the game.
We would spend our Saturdays playing our game, and then our Sundays watching the NFL. But the playing days eventually ended, and then the Sundays did too.
Everyone who knows me knows that there's nothing I love more than basketball. But football was always a close second. Baseball eventually became a game I came to love thanks to my wife and my father-in-law who is a baseball legend.
I have always been a fan of the Pittsburgh Steelers because my step-dad is a die hard fan of the team. Me and him bonded more and more over the years because of our shared love for the team.
But a lot has happened in the last few years in the NFL, and it's had me do a lot of thinking.
About five years ago, I was working for a website as a contributor for their NFL department. I wrote about the Pittsburgh Steelers 3-4 times a week. It was easy for me because all I had to do was write about the team. I loved that job.
But I wanted to go back to writing for myself, so after the season I went solo again. And the next season was when Colin Kaepernick decided to take a knee during the national anthem.
This story was already as big as news could possibly get, but it was even bigger here in Northern California because of the amount of San Francisco 49ers fans.
I remember being at a family gathering a couple weeks after the kneeling started, and I was talking to one person who is a 49ers fan and another person who doesn't really even watch football. They asked me how I felt about the situation. The 49er fan simply said "I think it's stupid." I kind of ignored it and explained why it was important that he continued to do what he was doing.
At the time, it never occurred to me that his acts could possibly keep him blackballed from the NFL. Especially after everything I had seen NFL players go through throughout the years and continue to be accepted by the NFL community.
And yet, it's three years later, and Colin is still out of a job.
Let's quickly run through a list of players who were given jobs in the NFL after being arrested for domestic violence. Let me take a deep breath . . . *breathes in heavily* . . . Shawne Merriman, Chad Johnson, Cedrick Wilson, James Harrison, Najeh Davenport, Larry Johnson, Dominic Rhodes, Leon Searcy, Corey Dillon, Reuben Foster, Johnathan Dwyer, Brandon Marshall, Santonio Holmes, Dez Bryant, Donte Whitner, Frostee Rucker...
Should I really keep going? The list seemingly never ends. Seriously, Google it.
The strange thing is that I've seen these guys get in trouble with the law, yet NFL owners and fans never seemed to care. As long as they played good on the field, it was all good. Time heals all wounds, right?
What about the victims? Do you think time healed their wounds? Do you think that them and their families that were also effected by these acts of violence just went on with their lives like normal?
Why do these guys get a second and third and fourth chance at success, while these people have to suffer in the dark corners of society? Because the NFL doesn't give a fuck about women, that's why.
But when a black man with a giant afro kneels for the rights of people who don't have the means to speak for themselves, White America (and many others) are offended to no end.
And again, we ask why . . . Because the NFL doesn't give a fuck about anyone's opinion except White America.
Blackballing Colin from the NFL cost the league and it's owners a lot of money in his lawsuit. And now he's going to have the opportunity to workout for a group of teams.
But just a few days before his workout, the NFL may have reached it's lowest point in league history in terms of their product.
Last year, Kareem Hunt was caught on camera not only hitting a woman, but then kicking her in the face while she was on all fours. The video surfaced and it ultimately cost him his job with the Kansas City Chiefs. I told myself that if he ended up getting a job, I wouldn't watch the NFL anymore.
And of course he was signed, by the Cleveland Browns. He was suspended for 8 weeks, and was finally allowed to return a couple weeks ago. Their nationally televised game against the Pittsburgh Steelers showed the world that still nobody cares about women or victims of domestic violence.
As the cameras panned across the stadium, you could see signs that said "Kareemland." Not a good look at all.
As I sat there watching the game, I found myself getting angry every time he came on the screen. It was my own fault. The only four games I watched all season were Steelers nationally televised games with my family. Pretty much the only reason I watched was because of that bond I always had with my step-dad.
And yet here I was, watching a game with the guy and team that had pushed me over the edge. The Browns played the way you would expect an organization who allows guys like this on their team to play.
Before halftime, two Steelers receivers got concussions due to hits from Browns players. Which led to one Browns player being ejected.
They looked like they were head hunting.
There was a moment in the game when Hunt got tackled and he got into a bit of a tussle with TJ Watt. As they stood there staring at each other, Hunt flexed his muscle and was chirping at Watt. And all I could think about was his violent history.
A grown man, stronger than your average citizen, getting so angry that he could possibly beat a defenseless person. As he stood there on the field, acting like he was ready to fight I felt disgusted in myself.
Mad at myself for allowing myself to think that it was harmless to just watch a Steelers game. Foolish to think that things could possibly change for the better. Disappointed in myself for watching, not knowing that things were about to get even worse . . .
In the closing seconds of the game, Mason Rudolph dumped a pass off to a receiver. After the ball was already gone, Browns player Myles Garrett continued to slam Rudolph to the ground. The play was over and the game was essentially over. But this moment was just beginning.
After he slammed Rudolph to the ground in a meaningless play, Rudolph was rightfully upset and grabbed Garrett's helmet in an attempt to get him off. Garrett followed up with one of the most violent in-game acts ever seen in sports history.
He began yanking on the facemark of Rudolph's helmet, bringing him up to his feet by brute force. He got the helmet off of Rudolph's head. As he was pushed back by a Steelers player in an attempt to calm him down, he used the helmet as a weapon to strike Rudolph's bare head with his own helmet. Possibly inches from hitting his temple and possibly killing the guy.
An act of violence, assault with a deadly weapon, crime was committed on the field of play.
And it was in that moment when I realized, this was the last NFL game I would ever watch.
How many "Todays" have you gone through? Probably, at least one for everyday of your life.
There's less "Yesterdays" and a million "Tomorrows"
So how are we treating Today? Are we treating it like another Yesterday or a Tomorrow?
Yesterday is nostalgic.
Yesterday is stories placed in your memories.
Yesterday leaves feelings of emotion that will last a lifetime.
Yesterday wasn't your best day.
Yesterday wasn't your worst day.
Yesterday is missed.
Tomorrow is what we're planning for.
Tomorrow is when we'll do that thing.
Tomorrow is where we place problems that have yet to happen.
Tomorrow motivates us.
Tomorrow destroys us.
Tomorrow is unknown.
Today is happening.
Today never ends.
Today is a battle that we continue to fight.
Today gives us strength from Yesterday.
Today teaches us lessons for Tomorrow.
Today carries us forward.
Today is here.
Remember jumping on a trampoline as a kid? Seems kinda dangerous, but kids are supposed to get hurt anyway.
You used to crawl into a ball and have all your siblings or cousins jump until they made you crack like an egg.
You used to tell everyone to jump at the same time to launch you so high that you can see your neighbors backyards who lives three houses away.
And then there was that one time when you lost all control and landed on the metal springs and scuffed up the entire right side of your body.
But no matter how many times you got injured, you kept hopping back up on that trampoline.
Why? Because you were stupid.
You were too blinded by how fun jumping on the trampoline was that you didn't care about how many times you got knocked down. You constantly got back up because it was fun.
Imagine if you treated life the same way.
I mean you've made it this far. Chances are that you're doing something right.
So why is it that when we get knocked down in life, we don't view it as much fun as a trampoline? Maybe it's because we view our life in a dangerous way.
We let our job define our path to our careers. We let our credit score define our financial goals. We allow society to infect us with the idea that falling down on the way towards our goals is failure itself.
You're going to take chances on yourself that turn out to be the wrong choices. But it's the choice itself to get back up after you've been knocked down that creates our paths.
Just think about all the people that love you. Do you think they'd ever be ok with you not chasing your dreams? Don't you think you owe it to them to keep pushing?
What about the generation that comes after you. Don't you want them to see you grinding? Being a role model for them by proving that it can be done.
The future you knows whats next on your path. It's up to you to decide whether or not you're going to keep on jumping, or if you're going to be the cracked egg.
If you haven't heard by now, the NBA and China are in a bit of a battle. The general manager of the Houston Rockets, Darryl Morey tweeted out "Stand for Hong Kong. Fight For Freedom." As the NBA is extremely invested in expanding their game to China, this statement was detrimental to the business relationship between these two.
Everyone who is anyone has made a comment on this situation. Even Donald Trump has put in his two cents, including numerous other political figures.
As a country that stands for democracy, the general consensus is that we should side with Hong Kong. But China is an incredibly strong country that is wealthy and most of the worlds goods and technology is filtered from them.
So it's been an incredibly thin line that many people have walked over the years. But this situation has brought awareness to what is going on between Hong Kong and China, and has allowed everyone to educate themselves on issues outside of our own country.
But if this tweet was never sent out, would most of us even know what's going on?
Just a tiny bit of insight to let you know what's going on, Hong Kong and China have been living a "Two Governments, One Country" for some time now. But recently, the protests have increased and China isn't having it. They've used force to try to silence those fighting for a democracy in Hong Kong.
China has allowed Hong Kong to live this way, but with many limitations. So as Hong Kong protesters continue to push their agenda, China has responded by flexing their muscle.
But that is just a very vague description of what is going on. The issues go much deeper, and have been debated by political figures and social activists for years. So everyone screaming and shouting their opinions now is so on brand with our social media world.
Because of the way the media has shifted our way of thinking, they have made you believe everything you see on television or the internet. And you must take a stance on one side or the other. And you better be on the right side of the fence or you will get taken down from every angle.
Right is right and Wrong is wrong, there is little to no nuance in our world anymore. What's a gray area?
There's no possible way for someone to be on the right side of every political and social issue in the world. If there was such a person, they would be like Jesus Christ on Earth. Shit, even The Pope got haters.
We have a hard time figuring out how to fix issues within our own country, it's baffling to see so many people with such strong convictions on right and wrong in this Hong Kong and China issue.
As a patriot of this country who takes pride in having the ability to vote and have my voice heard and having many freedoms, I'm all for living in a democratic world. However, I'm not a fool.
The world isn't so forgiving, and a democracy isn't the be-all and end-all of systematic government. If it was, then every country would follow the same system. Just look at where we're at! Many of the politicians that we elected are extremely evil and crooked, including the person we elected to be the leader of the free world.
So imagine China or some other country who doesn't run a democratic society. Do you really think they're looking at our country and thinking "Oh hey, maybe we should try that." Fuck no! We're an embarrassment right now. So before we start trying to influence other countries to follow our path, we have to be a better example.
Instead of telling others that their opinion is wrong and that they must speak up for freedoms, we need to live and breathe and promote it within our own country. But it needs to be in a positive way. And there are millions of people who are doing that everyday, and the future of our country thanks you.
But before we try to slam others for their way of living, we must look at it from all sides. I can't take a solid stance on this particular situation because I don't know anything about what's going on over there. I've never lived it, all I see is what the media allows me to see. And I don't talk bad about people behind their back.
So if you, or someone you know is knowledgable about this situation and is passionate about it, then I encourage you to speak your voice and let the world know what is really going on. But just be careful what you tweet, you may accidentally start World War III.
R Kelly had sex with underage girls and is a pedophile and a rapist.
That should be the end of the conversation. A grown man, taking advantage of young girls who are unable to fully understand right from wrong at this point in their lives. I mean the guy married Aaliyah when she was 15 and he was 27. That should've been the end of his story.
The documentary on Netflix that exposes him for the man he was *not so* behind closed doors, has surprisingly come with altering opinions on who is at fault.
In conversations I've had with both men and women, I have been surprised to hear people either coming to the defense of R Kelly or saying that these girls knew what they were getting into.
I guess even in 2019, sexual harassment and assault still isn't so black and white.
The opposing opinions I have heard are:
"Blame the parents, they knew who their daughters were with and they didn't do anything about it."
"If those girls didn't like the way they were getting treated, why didn't they just leave?"
"If they were old enough to have sex, they were old enough make better decisions for themselves."
Alright, so where to begin...
Men have been given an unbelievable amount of leeway when it comes to their sexual desires and what they are willing to do to make these desires come true. It has been like that since anyone can remember.
So this thought of women actually having the courage to make decisions based upon a man's actions, isn't as easy as it sounds. Just think about what happens whenever sexual assault allegations arise against a man.
Instead of people coming to the defense of the woman, people question her morals and her actions. Was she inebriated when this man took advantage of her? What is her angle against this man (Money, Extortion, Defamation)? Is she lying?
And in the criminal defense of these men, these are always the questions that must be answered in court. It is nearly impossible for men to get convicted of sexual assault crimes unless physical evidence exists. And even in those cases, a man may spend as little as a few months in a jail cell.
So knowing that women have little power to begin with when allegations are brought upon a man, why on Earth would these victims come forward and make these accusations if they are untrue? The answer is, they wouldn't.
I have been one of the people who unknowingly enabled this behavior in the past. I have a specific example in my mind that I can remember.
I am a huge Pittsburgh Steelers fan, and their quarterback Ben Roethlisberger was twice accused of sexual assault. And I specifically remember my stance on the situation. I believed that he was innocent and that these women were just either after his money or were trying to drag his name in the mud because of the fact that he maybe never called them back or something.
As if heartbreak was a reason for these women to accuse a man of sexual assault. I'm not sure why I was so quick to defend him, but in all honesty it was probably because so many people had the same stance.
It was almost as if he was viewed as the victim and he was defended as such until he was found not guilty in both instances. For all we know, maybe he was innocent.
But it doesn't change the fact that the real victims in these situations never get the benefit of the doubt. Theres always a million questions that they must answer to the world.
Maybe someone out there reading this has been a victim of sexual assault and has had to go through these issues. But if you haven't, try to put yourself in their shoes for a second.
You've just been sexually assaulted by someone you have come to know and trust. You are scared to come forward with this information for a number of reasons.
Maybe its because you're scared of the repercussions this person will have to go through. Maybe you're scared of what people may think of you and your sex life. Maybe you think people won't believe you.
And then when you do finally build up the courage to come forward, you are bombarded with a myriad of questions. "Why didn't you say this sooner? What evidence do you have? How do we know you didn't enjoy or want this to happen?"
Here you are trying to recover from what has happened to you, and yet you're expected to act like the bigger person.
Look, I'm not here to tell you right from wrong. But the thing is that this shit should already be perfectly clear what is right and what is wrong. Stop giving men reasons to try to get away with sexual assault. Stop giving pedophiles a way out by blaming the victims parents.
If your argument is that a child's parents should have been better at monitoring their children, the you're an enabler. Sure, you can blame the parent for not being more involved in their child's life. But is that really a reason for a grown man to take advantage of a young child?
The key term is "taking advantage", and the shit has got to stop.
And if you still have an argument or would like to debate this with me, I am willing to have anybody join me on a podcast to discuss this topic.