Taking New Steps

2020 has been a really good year for reflection.

I have always thought that I was doing enough in my life to support those who have been forgotten or unspoken for on behalf of our society. Those who don't have a voice, or their voice has been suppressed.

But I've realized that I haven't done nearly enough to help myself be a more understanding person. A more caring person. A more educated person. And a more progressive person.

I have tried to educate myself on other people's oppressions and what I can do to not only be an ally, but be an advocate. And as I've thought to myself how I can be better, I've learned that the best way I can be better is to teach my kids everything I didn't know. Everything I wish I would have known.

And my kids are taking their own steps towards the future, both figuratively and literally.

My youngest son Santiago is finally walking. He's been taking a couple steps here and there for a few months now. But he's been a lazy boy and has been just fine with doing a monkey crawl.

He was hella fast on all fours. Like a baby cheetah. But I think he just figured to himself Why walk when I can just get around like this?

So he finally decided that he was ready to walk. And on the same day he started running. And then walking into the pool with no floaties or life jacket. Just walked into the water.

I'm like Alright dude, you're basically telling me you could've been doing this shit the whole time you've just been either too lazy or just been a troll and gotten us to pick you up whenever you want to go a farther distance.

There is something cute as hell about watching a tiny human walk. My kids got my big ass head and skinny body so they're little lanky boys and if they walk too fast it looks like they're going to go head over heels because half of their weight is in their skull.

His first steps kinda put a lot of shit into perspective for me. Even though I've not quite done enough to help the movement up until this point in my life, I now have a new opportunity to make an impact as a father.

Not a father, like as in a priest, but like a Dad. Sorry, I had to clarify that for someone who once thought I was a "Father."

I have two little brown boys growing up in an America that is becoming more inclusive and secluded simultaneously. That is so hard to accept, but it's the truth.

So I can now take my first steps into teaching the youth that I have the most impact on. Teaching them how to not only accept all races, genders, and different walks of life, but how to learn about their struggles and celebrate their accomplishments.

How to learn from those who have gone through the fire and use that as a way to fuel the fire for the future. Giving them books written by people who have studied social science and how to break the cycle of having our youth's brains programmed to think a certain way about people outside of our culture bubble.

I could go way deeper, but I just wanted to say Thank You Santiago for giving me hope. For giving me strength when I felt like I was failing. For giving me a second chance at being a better person.