Having kids is a blessing. They'll change you for the better and make you grow in ways you never imagined.
The love you share with them is like no other love in this world.
They make you smile even through your worst times.
But sometimes man, oh my god, sometimes.
Theres a million things I love about my kids. I could go on and on about everything great they've brought into my life.
But why focus on the positives when I can gripe about the things they do that annoy me.
When my oldest son was a baby, that dude would literally be able to sleep in the middle of a party. Once he was out, he was out. Nothing was going to interrupt his sleep.
But now with my youngest baby, holy shit man. He could be in his crib in the room down the hall and you could sneeze and wake him up. It's so annoying.
It's like what you see on television where you have to be quiet whenever a baby falls asleep. That's him.
The worst is when he falls asleep in your lap, because you're screwed. Don't even think about putting him down, or even readjusting for that matter.
He's asleep right now, and I'm writing this on my laptop in another room with the door closed because I don't want the sound of me typing to wake him up.
I've had to become that parent that is tells people when they come over "Be quiet, the baby is sleeping." I hate being that guy.
My oldest son doesn't do anything more annoying than that, but he's got his own things that bother the hell out of me. Two things in particular.
The first thing is pretty common with little kids as they grow up. He's in this phase where when he wants something he says "Give me that." Like where did he even learn that?
I know damn well I been teaching this boy manners since day one. But he's pretty good at correcting himself after I say "Excuse me, what did you just say?" and give him that Dad look.
The other thing that I hate is that he can be such a crybaby sometimes. I get it, he's two years old. He's gonna cry.
But at the same time, please shut up. Like what the hell are you crying about? Keep it up and I'll give you something to cry about.
That high pitched crying scream is the worst sound to ever come out of a tiny human being's body.
Hate is a strong word. I love everything about my kids.
I complain about my baby being a light sleeper, when I'm the one who rocked him to sleep so that I could stare at him as he dreams.
I complain about my oldest being a crybaby, when I'm the one who tripped him so I could watch him fall and get very mildly injured for my own enjoyment.
My point is that it's ok to be annoyed by your kids. They're kids, they're annoying.
Some day they'll be talking to each other about what they hate about me, and I'm ready for it.
Once you're married, there's always pressure from people about creating a farm of children. "When is Baby #3 coming? Are you going to try for your girl? Your boys really need another friend to play with."
I'm not really sure what people's obsession is with trying to get couples to add to the population of the world when there's already plenty of people in it, with no end of growth in sight.
I know I may offend some people, but you guys will get over it.
Everybody in the world has parents one way or another. Probably the most obvious statement I've ever said, but it's a little deeper than that.
There's been good parents, bad parents, absent parents, happy parents, sad parents, unknown parents. Everyone was raised differently in their own unique ways. So every individual has their own perspective on parenthood.
For me, it's pretty simple. My mom had me at 15 years old and my dad wasn't exactly present throughout most of my life. He was there, but never in the way I needed him to be. I was an only child of a single mother. So naturally, I have tremendous respect for my mom and women in general, while my view on fatherhood is skewed.
I did have my step-dad who did a great job of raising me into the man I am, and I'm thankful for him. But there was still a long time in my life where I wished I had a better relationship with my biological father.
I would never want my children to feel forgotten or unimportant, so I raise them the complete opposite way my father raised me. Present in every way possible.
And although I love my kids and I love being a father, I never imagined I'd be raising two kids at 28 years old. As a father who never wants to miss a moment of their growth, it's a lot of work to give them as much attention as I do. And there's days where I feel like I'm not doing enough.
So to imagine bringing another child into our family feels like an impossible feat to win.
As we always say here, perspective is everything. Everyone loves to give advice on parenthood from the outside, when the fact is that every relationship and every child is different.
So if you don't want to have kids, don't allow the comments of others such as "So when are you going to have a baby?" bother you. Don't listen to the "You better have kids before it's too late." And definitely don't listen to "Cats aren't kids." because they are.
If you got kids and you feel like you're done having kids, then be done. Maybe one day down the line you'll change your mind, but do whatever you feel is right for you and your family.
To everyone who asks people when they're going to have more kids, I promise you the world has enough ankle biters out there. I just went to a wedding where kids weren't allowed, and there were still a bunch of those little fuckers running around. They just multiply.
So here's some advice for all you out there who want your friends or family members have more kids; Stay in yo lane!
If people want to have kids or not is on them. And people be having sex on the daily, so you don't gotta worry about whether or not they're doing what it takes to make kids. I know all y'all be fuckin'.
And whoever wants to watch my boys sometime, all you gotta do is ask. My wife and I would love a break here and there from those little devils in disguise.