WooHoo!

In my personal opinion, the whole point of having kids is so you can get them to say and do funny ass shit.

AJ is almost three now and he will literally copy anything I say or do, and will do exactly what I tell him to do.

Unless it's a chore or a task, then of course he acts like the world is ending. And that his hearing has suddenly stopped working.

One of my favorite things is when AJ says something cute and they're like "Oh my god, I can't believe he just said that!"

Because in reality it's me teaching him to say the right things in the right situations. Mostly using good manners and shit like that.

I wouldn't be able to live with myself as a parent if my kid didn't use proper manners. Like simple things like saying Thank You, May I, Please, I Love You, Have a good day. Anything that helps him be a better person, I want him to learn.

His favorite word right now is "WooHoo!" but mostly because it just makes my heart melt when he says it so I told him it's his favorite word.

But let's make one thing clear for those who don't know, I have a bad mouth. And I have never even attempted to hold myself back in front of my kids. They're gonna hear this shit anyway.

I'm not out here cussing like a sailor in public, but around my family and friends or in the comfort of my own home, I'm not going to censor myself just because of how it may make my children feel.

The real world is full of crazy shit, them hearing cussing is the least of my worries.

I'd rather expose my kids to the reality of the world then to shelter them until they become old enough to understand and become confused. The world ain't pretty.

Now if AJ is going around cussing up a storm, then I'm going to teach him right from wrong. But it doesn't mean I'm not going to record him saying "Futch You Daddy!" and send it to all of my friends. That shit is comedy gold. And it'll be hilarious for them to watch when they're older.

I know a lot of parents will think I'm being insensitive and selfish. But when you have kids, you sacrifice a lot. So you better believe that my voice and personality is one thing I ain't gonna sacrifice.

Santiago and AJ, I love you guys to death. But fuck that shit. Y'all drive me crazy sometimes so if I feel like saying "Fucking shit!" when I stub my toe, then you better believe I'm yelling it at the top of my lungs.

And when Too Short asks me what his favorite word is while you two are in the backseat, you already know what the fuck I'm singing out.

So if you hang around my kids, you have my permission to cuss in front of them. I really don't give a damn.